Battling exam stress

Present day school students are like soldiers going to a war, that's the level of stress that's felt in every home and school. It's time to find a way to keep this killing stress at bay. Ansy Austin offers some tips

No hanging out with friends, no TV, no Internet, in short, nothing else than the books - that isthe life of students who are to appear for exams. The visit to temples by the students and folks at home increases, probably a research would prove that maximum prayers are offered to God during this period. But indeed, apart from leaving it all to God, a lot can be done at an individual level to bring down those stress levels. Most importantly parents are required to be encouraging, supporting, appreciative and understanding rather than being followers of the race for the nineties. “I see to it that the environment at home is not tensed and keep joking around with my kids. But of course there is a fixed schedule for studying. I spend more time with them during this period, if they are too tensed I just shut their books and talk to them. I don’t push them too much and don’t keep too high expectations. They only compete with their previous performances.” says Sadhana Chawla whose three children have passed the board exams.

No need to fear
You fear going absolutely blank during an exam? Well that’s all in the mind. Well the mantra is simple, says Francesca Aranha, teacher, General Education Academy, “You only feel that you don’t remember, but it’s not so. I ask students to do deep breathing before they start writing, simple pranayam, following a timetable are ways you can stay away from exam stress.” Carl Laurie, principal, Christ Church School Byculla adds, “The question paper acts as prompter. It’s a scientific process. We have to reassure the students that though.”

Time for parents to de-stress
Unreasonably high expectations from parents, teachers, and society in general and an even higher level of competitiveness among the youth, brought on by pushy parents teaching kids to outperform their contemporaries, are the causes for stress and hypertension in today’s youth. “Parents must realise that ultimately everyone will get admissions and even if you fail you can still enter class XI (as long as you give the ATKT exams),” says Aranha. “They should be allowed to spend time with friends and watch television too,” she adds. Aakash Vasa, class X, Gopi Birla Memorial School opines, “High expectations from parents to top the class results in cramming up more stuff than what you are capable of. Add to that, the ever increasing workload and competition from peers, makes you succumb under the mental pressure.

Light diet, good sleep
“Eat well, have plenty of fruits as they make you feel fresh and not drowsy,”advises Dr Nirmala Rao, counsellor. “Students should sleep for atleast 8 hours,” adds Harish Shetty, psychiatrist. Pizzas, burgers and other heavy food items should be avoided; instead one should have lots of juices during this period. Harish also advices, “Drink lost of water and have a lightdiet with fruits. Clothing light can also make a difference.” He points out,

“Memory enhancing pills are absolutely useless, they don’t work. If you are well nourished and your hemoglobin is in the right proportion, there is nothing to worry.” It is vital to be mentally and physically healthy. For this one needs to play everyday for atleast 15 minutes, this could include screaming out or even cracking jokes during lunch and dinner.

Methods to adopt
“Keep telling yourself -’I will do well’. Visualisation is another method of keeping one’s mind relaxed and calm. We teach students this procedure, the mind works wonders. Be positive and believe in yourself,” asserts Nirmala. Apparently, if the student keeps telling himself/ herself, ‘I will get through’, then 50% of the tension vanishes. “A week before the exam don’t talk to people who are negative and also don’t talk to people who are too positive.Parents should talk less and smile more. Parents should not talk about the past, instead they should be cheerful,” says Harish on a serious note.

Be active, be regular
Pia Sutaria, class X, The Bai Avabai Framji Petit Girls High School asserts that she de-stresses with once a week dance class and music lessons. Dr Jyoti Nair, principal, New Horizon Scholars School, believes that the formative assessment in CBSE board has reduced exam stress to a large extent. “We conducts regular discussion on various topics in the form of objectivies and crosswords - doing this regularly reduces exam fear.” Neal A Iyer, one of the CBSE toppers from J H Ambani School, Lodhivali doesn’t believe in studying hard. “I decided to take less tension and work smarter rather than work hard. I used to study for about 4 hours and I kept taking breaks in between,” he asserts.

It’s just another exam!
You need to realise that its just another exam, not an exam for life, says Carl Laurie. He says, “I conduct presentations for students on time management throughout the year and I tell them that exam success is only one facet of life.” Concludes Dr Harish Shetty, psychiatrist, “It is the first exam of life, not the last exam. It’s not a stepping stone to success,it is a stone with many miles to go. It does not tap all talents of the child, it taps the rote learning ability.”

GET RID OF EXAM FEVER

• Start the day well with prayers and some exercises

• Sleep and eat well during exams

• Laugh, scream, and joke to release tension

• Avoid anxious people

• Wish your friends, that boosts your confidence too

Before every paper visualize your best paper in the past. This calms you down. Do not be obsessed to revise every word a day before. Study as much as you can. Suddenly after a paper you may get very tense if you have bungled an easy answer. Remember Sachin has got the maximum number of ducks. Immediately share this small bad news with a trusted friend. Get it of your mind. Wish your parents good luck with a hearty laugh. Talk to friends who are honest. Avoid those who utter…’I have finished 10 revisions’ or ‘dude forget studies…lets enjoy’ Dr Harish Shetty, Psychiatrist

The message: Don’t pass or fail life, live it

As Student Suicides Continue, Concerned Parents, Teachers, Psychiatrists And Police Focus On Woes Of Worried Youth

Anahita Mukherji | TNN

What’s common between a well-known actor and theatre personality, an IIMBangalore alumnus and a Mumbaibased journalist? As students, all of them had a taste of failure. Yet, they have all done well in their careers. Their motto: Don’t give up on life.

Take, for instance, Juhi Babbar, a well-known theatre personality, and the daughter of actors Raj and Nadira Babbar. Juhi never fared too well at school and was on the verge of failing Class VI. “It was a terrible feeling. The thought of losing my friends and putting my parents through a great deal of embarrassment just added to the pain,’’ she says. While she had a great set of friends, it sometimes bothered her that she fared the worst in studies amongst all of them. For Juhi, it was the people around her, like a supportive mother and a bunch of friends who didn’t judge her by her marksheet, that helped her through that period in her life.

Bhisham Mansukhani, a Mumbai-based journalist who has worked for some of the country’s leading publications, knows what it’s like to flunk exams. He failed five out of seven subjects in Class IX. Initially, he withheld his marksheet and lied to his parents about having passed in all subjects. “While I was too naive to actually know what suicide meant, I did consider it as a means of escaping having to show my parents my marksheet,’’ he says.

It was only after a few counselling sessions with psychologist Maya Kriplani, a consultant at his school, that he had the guts to face his parents over his marks. “I confided in my mother over my score. To my surprise, she took it far better than I had imagined,’’ he adds. Then, there’s Satya Narayanan R, an IIM-Bangalore alumnus who is the founder and chairman of Career Launcher, an education company that provides coaching for competitive exams and has set up 20 schools across the country as well as a university in Rajasthan.

Satya flunked his physics practicals as a Delhi schoolboy and didn’t appear for the Class XII board exams the first time around as he was too busy concentrating on cricket instead of studies. He has scant respect for an education system that lays more than a fair share of emphasis on marks. “I feel that educationists need to accept the fact that education is a framework for learning and nothing more. I’m not saying that excellence should not be craved. I’m just saying that excellence is not equivalent to 100% in mathematics,’’ he adds.

Jahan Peston Jamas, an SYBCom student at HR College, echoes these sentiments. “After working really hard in Class X, I was very disappointed when my score was only 75%,’’ he said. Over the years, his marks kept dipping. He scored 67% in Class XII and 57% in FYBCom. “There were times when I felt like a failure in life. But now, I have realised that there is so much more I can learn beyond studies,’’ he says. “While poor scores can be very demoralising, it’s important to pick yourself up and get on with life.’’

Jamas should know. He and five other students with poor scores successfully completed the mammoth task of compiling the data of 46,800 college alumni so they could be invited for the golden jubilee celebrations of the college. “Of the six of us, three were dyslexic, one had dyscalculia and I was just an average student,’’ he says.

TENSE TIME: Police outside the Juhu school, a student of which killed himself at his chawl (right) on Monday

Television, chats go on as before

Orkut, TV and long phone calls to friends are all a part of this teenager’s life, even as she gears up for the HSC exams. “I want my daughter to lead a normal life, even during the exams,’’ says Ashwini’s mother, Mamta Kulkarni.

The daughter of a pilot and a school vice-principal, Ashwini has faced little parental pressure before the exams. “Once a month, I take my daughter out for a movie to ensure she doesn’t panic,’’ says Kulkarni, who feels that children are already stressed during the exams, and it’s unfair for parents to stress them even further.

Mamta, or her husband Tushar, do not interfere in their daughter’s studies and allow her to revise her portion on her own.

ASHWINI KULKARNI
SM Shetty High School & Junior College, Powai
(Class XII)

Ashwini Kulkarni with her parents

Films help keep board blues at bay

The son of a policeman who is in charge of some of Mumbai’s highways, Vishesh says his parents have gone out of their way to ensure that he is in a relaxed frame of mind while studying for the board exam. Every few weeks his parents Sandhya and Rakesh send him to watch a film with friends.

Every alternate day, Vishesh goes down for a game of football with his friends. “Football really helps me concentrate on my studies,’’ says Vishesh.

“My parents have told me not to worry about the exams,’’ he adds. Vishesh appreciates his parents for their attitude towards his Class X exams, especially since he has seen other classmates crumble under pressure. “A friend of mine used to score 80 per cent in Class IX. His parents pressurised him to such an extent that he now scores only 50 per cent,’’ says Vishesh.

VISHESH SHARMA
Holy Family High School, Andheri
(Class X)

Vishesh Sharma with his mother

Not quantity, but quality time matters

Don’t study so much. Go out and do some exercise.’’ This certainly doesn’t sound like the kind of advice a typical father would give his daughter a few months before her Class X board examination. But that’s exactly what Shivika gets to hear from her dad.

“There has been no pressure on me to study. I’ve studied on my own without my parents ever pressurising me,’’ says Shivika.

And Shivika has taken her father Shirish’s advice rather seriously. She goes out for a walk whenever she can. “During the exams, a half-hour walk helps to clear my mind,’’ says Shivika.

A movie buff, Shivika says she has had to cut down on the number of films that she could manage to squeeze in during Class X, when compared with the previous year. “But I still watch a movie at least once or twice a month,’’ says Shivika, who loves catching the premier show of every film.

“I don’t think the quantity of time for which a child studies is important. A few hours of quality study make a lot more sense than studying the entire day at a stretch,’’ feels her mother Supriya. “I’ve seen kids studying from morning to night without really absorbing what’s in the textbook,’’ she adds. She has also encountered parents who fuss over the loss of a single mark in an exmaintaion, something she does not believe in.

SHIVIKA POONGLIA
JB Petit High School Fort
(Class X)

Shivika (second from right) with her family

Great scores are not a big deal

While Zara herself tends to get stressed over the ICSE, her parents are quick to remind her that exams are no big deal and certainly not worth losing sleep over. “They don’t want me to wake up before 7 am,’’ laughs Zara.

In fact, whenever she gets tense about the boards, her parents Reshad and Nilofer point out that they themselves were not high scorers in their board exams but are doing well in life anyway. Incidentally, her parents left well-paying corporate jobs to set up their own furniture business.

Unlike the funeral-like atmosphere in most homes when a child is studying for an examination, Zara’s parents insist on her attending all family functions, and even take her out for dinner twice a month. In fact, her parents don’t even plan to take a break from their work during Zara’s exams.

What’s more, they ensure she gets out of the house at least thrice a week for some exercise. “Either I go to the gym or for a walk,’’ she adds.

And Zara hasn’t missed out on movies while studying for the board exams. Every weekend she rents out a DVD. She manages all this in addition to her studies, not at the cost of them. “While I tend to pressurise myself, my parents are absolutely relaxed,’’ laughs Zara.

After every two hours of study, Zara’s mother calls her out of her room for a chat, just to make sure her daughter’s feeling fine.

ZARA RUSTOMJI
JB Petit High School Fort
(Class X)

Zara (extreme left) with her family

Study hard, party hard too PARENTS TELL KIDS

National Crime Records Bureau statistics (2007) show student suicides rose 6% across the country, most due to exam-related stress. TOI, however, finds some parents refuse to pressurise their kids though board exams are round the corner and are keen they don’t lose out on a childhood in pursuit of perfect scores

Music makes him calm

Jeffrey’s mother Volga has helped him prepare a study timetable that has a special one-hour slot reserved for playing football with his friends in the compound every day. It even has an hour slotted for computer games. He listens to music while studying and even makes time for a half hour of meditation. And after every hour of study, he takes a 30-minute break.

His parents, including father John, doesn’t think it’s a good idea for kids to study till late into the night. So even as Class X students elsewhere burn the m i d n i g h t oil, Jeffrey is asleep by 10 pm.

“It’s not important how high he scores. As long as he gives the exam his best shot, we’re happy,’’ says Volga.

JEFFREY NEELANKAVIL,
Holy Family High School, Andheri

(Class X) Football and friends make it fun
Sachin gets seven to eight hours of sleep a day, watches a movie a month and never misses his daily game of football even with the board exams just a month away. His parents Wilson and Betsey have told him that it’s OK if his marks aren’t too good.

“I think the pressure surrounding board exams is rather exaggerated, to the extent that children lose out on a childhood,’’ feels Sachin’s father. “I am happy that my son is relaxed and that he plays football everyday. If he doesn’t play at this age, when will he ever play? There needs to be a healthy mix of work and play in a child’s life.’’

“Relatives and collegaues felt Sachin’s year in Class X must have been very hectic for our family. They feel social life must be put on hold at a time like this. But this is something I do not believe in,’’ says Menezes. “While people expected me to be strict with Sachin and keep him away from parties and functions, I allowed him to attend them. I don’t think it makes sense to study continously without a break. I’m happy with the amount of study that he has put in,’’ he adds. Sachin’s two sibblings, as well as several friends in the building, have ensured that Class X was fun for him as any other year.

SACHIN MENEZES
Holy Family High School, Andheri
(Class X)