SCHOOLING INTERRUPTED

Education is one of the most important aspects of childhood. But, increasingly, many children are feeling a reluctance to attend school. The reasons are serious and psychological, say psychiatrists, who add that with the right guidance and a touch of compassion the child can be coaxed back into the classroom

Shreya Bhandary | TNN

Eight-year-old Sonia Pradhan was a normal student who loved extra-curricular activities as well as studying. However, Sonia gradually began to make excuses to not attend school. Her excuses became more frequent over time and her mother realized something was wrong.
“Everyday she would complain of headaches, stomach aches, body ache, fever and so on. She would excuse herself from going to school. We visited many neurosurgeons to understand what the problem was and they all told us that the problem was psychological,” said Sonia’s mother, Manisha.
Five years after the excuses first began cropping up, Sonia has begun attending school again, but she still finds it difficult to attend regularly.
Psychiatrists diagnose her problem as ‘school phobia’ or ‘separation anxiety’. Separation anxiety occurs when a child becomes anxious as he or she has become separated from the primary caregiver, usually the mother. Psychiatrists say they have been dealing with an increasing number of school phobia and separation anxiety cases.
“The reasons for school phobia could be anything from eve teasing at school to a strict teacher to problems at home that affect the child’s emotions and psychology. An increasing number of parents have been coming to us with such problems now,” said Dr Harish Shetty, a psychiatrist.
Sonia has been attending regular counselling sessions with a psychiatrist for the past five years after much deliberation by her family. “This is not mental instability but psychological instability and I knew my daughter needed help. But I had a tough time convincing my family,” said Manisha, who is part of a joint family.
Similar problems had to be tackled by the Malhotras after 11-year-old Puneet began displaying such behaviour. A sudden attack of asthma hit his mother while Puneet was at home and he then became filled with the fear that he might lose her forever. “He thought that he might lose his mother if he wasn’t around her all the time. He would cry all the time or suddenly start coughing to the extent that he would throw up and still keep coughing,” said Neelu Malhotra, Punnet’s aunt.
As in Sonia’s case, the Malhotras needed convincing to get professional help. “We knew the problem was psychological, but my brother-in-law was dead set against visiting a psychiatrist,” said Neelu.
While in class, Puneet would suddenly walk out as he felt “suffocated”. Soon, he began returning home from school after one or two lectures. After detailed discussions between the doctor, parents and school representatives, it was decided that Punnet could skip classes till he was ready to return to school. “My nephew didn’t attend school for an entire year when he was in Class VII. All that time he attended regular sessions with a psychiatrist and his parents kept consoling him to ward off his panic,” said Neelu.
Sonia, meanwhile, showed stronger signs of refusal. “She would throw things at us to keep us away,” said the girl’s mother. “Once, she locked herself in the room and tied a cloth around her neck. We were too shocked to react.” That was when her family finally decided to approach a psychiatrist.
Dr Shetty stresses that there is no quick-fix cure in such cases. “Schools as well as families need to understand that the healing is a very slow process,” he said.
While in both of the above cases, separation anxiety was termed as the sole cause of the behaviour, city psychiatrists say a number of school phobia cases have also been reaching their clinics.
In many cases, it is children with a very high IQ who are slowly opting to not attend school. “I am currently treating a child who hasn’t gone to school for three weeks,” said Dr Shubhangi Parkar, head of the psychiatry ward, KEM Hospital. “She was yelled at by a teacher and when she shared this with her mother she was again yelled at for being mischievous. The child then completely stopped sharing her feelings with anybody.” Parkar added that while such problems arise partly at schools, the major contributors to such fears come from immediate friends and relatives.
With the help of psychiatrists, both Sonia and Puneet gradually began attending lectures again. “Puneet would get fully dressed for school but only go up to the school gate for some days. A few weeks later he started walking into the school premises and then began attending one lecture a day,” said Neelu. She added that school authorities were very helpful and supportive throughout.
It took more than six months for Sonia to start going to class again, but the problem is far from solved. “I still wake up with the fear that my daughter will suddenly announce that she will not go to school,” said Manisha, who has started taking math tuitions herself. “Since she’s not attending school, at least I need to be up to date with her portion.”
(Names of students and their relatives have been changed.)
GOING
BACK TO SCHOOL
School phobia and separation anxiety are the result of psychological, and not mental, instability
Children coming from overly protective families and single children (those without siblings) are more prone to be affected
Children with a higher IQ are also likely to opt out of school
Returning from a long vacation can have its effects too, with children deciding they don’t want to return to a classroom
School phobia can result from excessive scolding at school and/or home , though maintaining discipline at home is important so that an institutional environment with rules and regulations does not seem alien
Sexual harassment or abuse can also bring on school phobia. Such cases have to be dealt with even more sensitively
Along with the affected child, the parents can also undergo counselling to better understand the problem
The healing process in such situations is slow. It could take months, sometimes years. Patience plays a key role
Always involve the school authorities in the process. In fact, the student, parents and school should work together. Seek the help of psychiatrists